Monday, December 8, 2008

Offline

So, my compy threw the hugest hissy fit last week, ate a virus, and refused to grant me access to the internet. I fiddled with it for awhile, but after a few hours, I realized I would have to call a geek to fix it. I called Memzy. She was all, "Shed's the geek, not me. And he's gay, too. Did you see my blog?" Me says slowly, "er, no, as I have no internet access." Her says, "that's right" in an even slower, pitying sort of way, followed by an awkward pause, and I know I'm different already. I've lost my internet status. I am nobody.

I had to actually find a paper phone book (dated 2006, you gize!) and call a geek to come fix it my compy, but they couldn't come until the next day.

For one day and two nights, I was completely offline.

Let me tell you, it was an uncomfortable eerie feeling to be in the dark ages like that. Something just felt wrong, but it was a subtle feeling of wrongness. Like an M. Nightshyamalan movie.

I did frantic things, like scrubbed the dried Kool Aid spills from the inside on my fridge, and took a pumice stone to my toilet bowls.

Nightmarish indeed!

After a day without the internet, Tony and I couldn't take it anymore and we went to Best Buy to look into buying a new compy so as not to prolong our lack of internet access for even one more minute. In the end, we got our wits about us and decided not to do anything so drastic. The economy, ya know. We went to a bookstore, and I bought Regency Buck instead. A fine book! I read it in one sitting. The geek arrived the next morning, fixed our compy in 25mins, took our check for $90, and finally... world peace.

It took me days to catch up on my emails and celeb google searches. Now I'm ready to blog again, you gize.

10 comments:

Annie said...

I'm so glad that little mystery is cleared up. Welcome back.

Hot Pants said...

I love geeks. Well, really just one geek in particular.

quesetescapa said...

What is up with everyone having tech issues lately? Well, you and memz. I take it you have some sort of PC... well glad you are back.

Katie said...

I am so glad to have you back. For some reason, you seem to be the center of the blogging universe. Our sun. It was a dark day...I don't want to talk about it.

Markie23 said...

See the "Geek" post on my blog.

Landee said...

I like the geek in the pink and that's about it.

Soooo glad you're back. My world felt subtly wrong as well but more in the Uglies way.

Mary said...

I've missed your blogging too. You just got me going an you left the scene. Glad to know you're back.

Krissy and Jason said...

Do you know that whenever i go to type in "guys" my fingers automatically go to the g-i-z-e keys now...wierd huh? Missed ya, glad you're back!

Emily said...

I think your fans would have been more upset than you if that disaster hadn't been fixed!

Memzy said...

It was so funny how, at first, you thought I might be able to help and stuff. ::nervous laugh:: But yeah, it was awkward you being offline while we talked on the phone. It's like we had nothing to talk about.