Friday, September 19, 2008

Panic

Have you ever had a panic attack? I used to think only hypochondriacs had panic attacks, or people who visit chiropractors, but then it happened to me. So I'm either a hypochondriac, have back problems, or panic attacks are real.

Anyway, the first time it happened, I thought I was having an asthma attack. I happened to be driving at the time, so I pulled over and called my brother Tom. I couldn't calm down enough to tell him that I couldn't breath, so I had to pass the phone back to Cord. Next thing I knew, my SIL Katie was there, loading me into her van and driving me to a doc-in-the-box.

A panic attack is brought on by high anxiety--it's psychological but produces physical sensations like heart palpitations, shaking, and the struggle to breathe. You know that part on the movie Airplane, when the lady starts to panic and a long line of people forms down the isle, waiting for their turn to slap her and tell her to "get a hold of" herself, and there's one guy in line with a baseball bat? Well, that's what happened to me at the doc-in-the-box. Except for the baseball bat.

But nurses lining up to shout at me to get a hold of myself didn't work, and it was soon apparent that I would not be able to calm down without the aid of a "magic pill," so Katie dropped me off at her house while she ran to pick up my "magic pill" prescription. What followed was a crazy out-of-body experience. Word had quickly spread that Jenny was dying, and boy did my family unite! I sat on Katie's couch, trying not to think about anything--mind over matter--while a procession of family members gathered at Tom & Katie's house to see me, or called to see how I was doing. As each new person showed up, they would first ask me how I was doing, and that would take me out of my "Zen" and I'd start gasping for air. Even if I heard them discussing what was wrong with me amongst themselves, or talking about me on the phone, I'd panic and start gasping.

I think this is the biggest drama I have ever caused, and it was actually a blast!

But after I took one "magic pill," I was suddenly back to normal and everyone lost interest in me. I had a giant bottle of pills and I never even had to take a second one.

I didn't realize what caused the first panic attack until the second one happened. Both occurred just days before Anthony and I were leaving the kids to go out of town by ourselves. We've only done it twice. The first time we went out of the country, so maybe that's why I was way out-of-control, because the second time I could get a grip without any "magic pill." I've left the kids home with Anthony to go on "girls trips" before, and that never makes me panic, only if we both go without the kids.

So I finally figured out what was causing them. But then, a few days ago, it happened again.

We don't have any trips planned.

I have a sneaking suspicion of what might have caused it this time. Not positive, still trying to figure it out. Anyway, I thought it would be fun if everyone gathered at my blog and asked if I was OK, or discussed what is wrong with me in my comments.

Proof, that the most fascinating things in my life are menial.

28 comments:

Amy Thurston said...

Did this maybe occur from a discussion you may have had with a 911 contact? Sorry.

ajesplin said...

Er, no.

Amy Thurston said...

Did it happen when you thought you were being flanked?

ajesplin said...

yep

Cristin said...

that's scary...are you ok??? Do you need anything? Should I call your RS President and get some dinners set up for ya??? You might as well milk it for all it's worth.

Krissy and Jason said...

First of all i hope you are okay! And second of all i have so many questions...was amy right, is the flanking what caused the attack, is that why you were breathing funny when you were running, are you sure it wasn't caused by the fact that Jacob imprinted on Renesme instead of you?

All joking aside, i hope you are feeling better, that is pretty scary!

p.s. love the new profile picture!

ajesplin said...

Thanks for the overwhelming outpouring of sympathy, you gize. It's not serious or anything, just kind of mysterious and embarrassing--I only "lost it" once the other day but I feel like I'm constantly on The Verge lately, if you know what I mean. What do you think? Should I go to a TheRapist? A chiropractor? Take one of my old expired "magic pills" from 2 years ago?

It wasn't related to running or my special breathing technique--which is working fabulous, btw.

Amy Thurston said...

Have you ever considered an Analrapist?

Erin Beck said...

swear to gosh I have a panic attck every morning when I wake up only I gots no magic pills. Did you call your "emergency" friend when yours??

Erin Beck said...

Amy what is an Anal rapist??

Erin Beck said...

Amy why would you recommend an Anal Rapist? what kind of "emergency" friend are you?

Amy Thurston said...

Have you never seen Arrested Development? You are putting the wrong emphasis on the wrong syllable.

And no, she didn't call me. I guess some things need to be saved for the blog.

ajesplin said...

^^Let's keep 'em clean you gize.

Erin, you were my emergency contact, but every time we'd finish talking about you, and the subject would change to me, your connection would mysteriously "break up" and the call would drop. "what? what? something about you, Jenny? I can't hear, going under a tunnel..." ::click:: So I thought I should switch to a plan with better coverage.

Landee said...

::slapping you across the face::

GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!!

I'm not a doctor, but I play one on your blog.

I'm sensing that your unorthodox sleeping patterns combined with an influx of humor in your life in the past month or so has caused your brain to overheat. Take two of these ::handing you your expired pills:: and call me in the morning. Or respond here.

In all srsness, I think that staying up all night thing is all connected here somehow.

Jami said...

ok, ok...let the liscensed therapist through. Wait though...will you sue me for malpractice if I give you crappy advice?

Amy Thurston said...

Jami has helped us w/ our problems at many a girls night out. Never once has any of us sued her. I actually love her crappy advise, and would suggest you get some yourself.

Vegas Family said...

I used to panic if my hair wasn't completely crimped into a dry frizzy mess when I left the house each day. So, I can sort of relate.

Amy Thurston said...

Analyst + Therapist = Analrapist

Markie23 said...

Laughter is the best medicine. Take an episode of The Office and call me in the morning.

Amanda said...

I can't even picture you having a panic attack and I must know why it happened again. So if you get it figured out, post it or else.
That sounds pretty bad. Are you okay?

abutler said...

I hope your okay. And what's this "magic pill" you speak of. I have somewhat of the same disorder that may need the help of a "magic pill." Can you help?

Katie said...

The reason I still have your table saw is 'cause the day that happened I was 2" away from finishing my hard wood floors. I was so traumatized by your creepy behavior, that every time I look at the 2" of bare concrete in my kitchen I have a PTSD episode.
I'm on medication now and as soon as it kicks in I'll finish my floors and bring your saw back.

This is tom

Emily said...

Panic Attacks suck. Rob used to get them all the time--in fact he got one when he was in Law School and and the paramedics had to come get him. Thank goodness for magic pills...

Memzy said...

1. Flank is my new fave word. I'm gonna make it into an adjective or verb or something cool. Isn't that flank-tastic?

2. I could talk to you about panic attacks. When I borned my boys they screwed up my hormonals BIG time and I had to take a few magic pills. By the time I had the third one me and my doc figgered it out. No more magic pills! Still, those are fun to have around, no?

ps. As you may have already read....being away from Blogland for 4 days SUCKETH to the Nth degree.

Landee said...

Memz, why were you only gone three days on my blog but four over here? If I were Jenny, I'd kindly ask you to go flank yourself.

ajesplin said...

^^Somebody up there is pulling my flank.

Mary said...

Jenny, sweetie, this is your mama telling you to cool it and have more confidence in yourself, cause I think a lack of confidence is the source of your panic. You have proven time and again, that you can do anything you put your mind to. So get on the ball and take care of that matter we talked about!

Sam, Shel & Co said...

I would have never guessed you could have panic attacks. You're always so together, at least whenever we've seen you. But, I know they're scary (had a roommie with probs like that), and I hope you figure it out soon! You should come visit for some R & R in a beautiful place.

I panic when we leave Meghan to go out of town, but mostly I'm worried whether the friends we left her with will still be our friends when we get home. :0)